Aside

The little brown box…

Within the core of every human spirit lies a dream, a true passion for life yet the lack of determination, hard work and will power to actualise the dream overpowers the passion that lies within.

There is a box that exists, we as a human race have placed ourselves inside of this box, we do this for a few reasons; it provides a sense of security, a sense of comfort, a false sense of happiness and it is believed that if you escape this box, you will not survive the world outside of it. We therefore, stay here, follow the rules, listen to those we assume senior to us, keep pushing through this mundane routine and call it life. There is a name for this box, it is called our comfort zone.

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It is ok to have a comfort zone as long as you own it!

What I mean by this is, many people stay within what they know, because getting out is too difficult, people stay in abusive relationships because it’s too difficult to be alone, people can’t leave toxic work spaces because they believe that they need stability to survive this world, house wives who are unhappy, stick around because  the thought of having to be financially independent scares them, people leave high school and work at one company for years and years, never make a change and don’t know any better then to spend 9 hours of the day sucking up to their bosses so they can always be the “Teachers pet” even at work… All of these people have no control over their lives, victims of their own creation! Little toy soldiers in the palm of their abusers hand!

I have a box too, but my box isn’t the place where I work, it isn’t the home in which I live in, it isn’t the people who I love, it is the entire world, everyone who I have met and yet to meet! Can you imagine that? Being at ease and comfortable wherever you are in this world, having the ability and strength to get up leave every time someone even attempts to control your happiness and freedom instead of playing victim and punishing yourself?

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If you can imagine it, then you can live it, my advise to anyone is… If you are unhappy leave, if you believe in something, fight for it, if you don’t like your box find a new one, the bigger the box the more freedom you have, or better yet, throw the box away, if a person makes you unhappy, you have a choice to stay or leave, wherever you are at this point in time, is a result of a choice that you have made, and if you are unhappy with where you are right now, then it is time to make a different choice.

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Aside

Riding this wave with pleasure!

When I turned 30 this year, I felt an immense amount of pressure to do something big, try something different, or start some kind of new chapter. To be quite honest, my spirit was dull because, everyone who isn’t 30 yet, looked at me with an expectation of “What are you going to do now?”and friends who are already 30 (And single) were telling me that I am at the beginning of the best chapter of my life,  as a result, I feel this salient obligation to society to make my 30’s epic.

Should I travel more, work more, get a dog, do I pick a human and date it, gym harder, get a new look, change careers… WHAT? I then decided, the best is to to give up being a people pleaser and wake up every morning as I have for the past 30 years and do whatever I feel like.

 Anyway, the real reason I am writing this blog:

A few of my friends (Girls) who have turned 30 before me and are still single, often go on about how they need to settle A.S.AP, how they are hoping to find someone and start a family…. YAAAAWWWN.

Do you have any idea how exhausting it is, to think, that you’re going out on an awesome girls night but instead, the night turns into a huge session of having to listen to someone go on and on and on and ONNNNNN about how she needs a man and how she prays everyday for the right man to swing by? What happened to enjoying a moment for what it actually is?

So now that I am 30, I FINALLY feel it safe to voice my opinions on, still being in the market at 30 and beyond. Truth be told, I feel that there is nothing sexier then being 30, single and absolutely fabulous!!!

Think about it, there’s nothing or no one stopping us from doing anything we want, and we can do it anywhere in this entire world. For me, it’s a bit of a blessing that I am a loner, mostly because I hate waiting on people to make up there minds. I want to wake up, decide and do, my motto…

Don’t think just do!

If you’re not a loner and you’re 30 with no man on the horizen, best you try and start enjoying your own company,  because once you do, you will have the time of your life. It’s a sense of freedom that you can never get if you are committed to anyone.

Yes yes, I know being married or popping them babies out could be fun expensive and exhausting too, at some point in my life I did want it, but this marriage thing has to wait a little, just till I have exploited this freedom of the third decade, first as a single woman, then maybe later I’ll pick that human and settle.

Before I start sounding like a complete feminist, which I definitely am not, I do have to point out, that I have been in a long term relationship at some point, and I know the transition so well, the one from doing your own thing, to now having to compromise on certain things to accommodate a new person in your life. The thing about this transition is that, it happens so quickly, it’s like a massive tsunami that hits you, knocks you off your feet and before you know it, you are riding a brand new wave, it’s a great thing, but you also now have to start compromising on certain things and may not be able to do as much as you could when you were single.

My advice…

Embrace the single wave, exploit every opportunity that presents itself, don’t waste time praying for a man, rather make a few million dollars before 35, travel every inch of the world, make a new friend everyday, do something that will change your tomorrow, so that when that tsunami hits, you have no regrets and an amazing story to tell!!!