When I say I am an editor, often people think “Oh she sits and has fun all day” Firstly, yes I do, I love my my job, but secondly, it’s an art, I always edit from the heart, never from my head, it’s a feeling not a science.
I have been through the journey with Madiba in a documentary edit, I have followed doctors kayaking through Lake Tanganyika helping kids with Malaria and Cleft lip on the way, I edited the journey of South African kids who got an opportunity to go to school for a year in London, Corporate videos for banks, promotional videos for hotels and casinos, the list is endless…
Through my job, I get to travel, I get to explore other careers, I get to celebrate with others, I craft stories of people of all walks of life, from humble beginnings right up to CEO’s of massive companies, I generally love it, it’s like a new book everyday, but today I cut something that I have never had to do in all my years of editing…
I sit here physically and emotionally drained from one of the worst edits I have ever had to do…
A memorial tribute video for a colleague who has just lost his 12 year old son.
I spent 4 hours of today, sick to my tummy, holding back tears and literally trembling as I compiled a visual montage of all the happy moments of a 12 year old boy who is no longer here.
As a spiritualist I am meant to accept and understand, to be calm and almost objective, but I just cannot do this today. I am overwhelmed by anger, sadness and a sick feeling knowing that behind this montage of joy and special moments, there is a mum and dad out there who sent their son to school one morning and 30 minutes later they are left devastated in a hospital as they to bid farewell to their boy.
I cannot accept this, it may seem like a small thing to many of my friends who see this quite often in their careers, and this is something that is beyond anyones control, but it just doesn’t sit right with me, I cannot accept it, no one should ever have to bury their own child, it makes me question our whole existence, it makes everything else feel so irrelevant, the control freak in me wants to go and have a chat/argument with the someone who is in charge, undo it and make it right but I can’t….
I just can’t 😦